My Secondary School Destroyed My Appetite

My sister is about to graduate from secondary school so I think it’s time to write another TRUE LIFE story about my secondary school. You see the picture on the header. My almamater’s dinning hall looked nothing like that.

I pride myself in bragging about the size of my almamater’s dinning hall. It was big. It had a capacity of over 2000 people. My problem was that the food on the other hand was small. Sometimes it was minuscule. It was so small that if you used your hand to eat what we call swallows (Eba, Amala, Fufu, pounded yam) as against the mandatory forks, you would finish your food if your hand went to from your plate to your mouth twice. A swallow like FuFu, usually smells, but in that dinning hall, it oozed. It could knock you unconscious. The meat we were served were popularly referred to as seasoning cubes (Maggi and knorr) because you could swallow them with ease.

Something else about the dinning hall was that, it was a common perception that food removal equipment had been installed somewhere in the doors. What I mean is that, the moment you literally stepped out of the dinning hall you would feel hungrier than when you first stepped in. You can ask any of the nearly 2000 people who currently school there or any of the over 10000 people who graduated from there if you think I am lying. I personally believe the food we ate was only enough to get us out of the dinning hall before returning us to the mercy of hunger.

Weird things also happened in that dinning hall. I remember there was a time when the loaves of bread we ate were always partially blue in colour. We complained to the management and their response was “it is the bowls we put them in that turn them blue”. I remeber also when the assistant head boy of my set, ate a bread that had a dead cockroach in it. It was like a Nollywood movie. But as a cool guy he let it slide. If it were me…all hell would have broken loose! There was also the fact that we almost always found hair in our food. The management said it was hair from the female students.

The dinning hall humbled us, it thought us that though our school fees is between 200-500 thousand we would still eat chicken only on founders day, children’s day, Independence Day and never again. We were taught to treasure chicken as a celebrative food and not as something that could or should be eaten anyday one chooses. Obviously I understand the financial and environmental implications of killing thousands of chickens every week so I forgave them. 

What I will never forgive them is what they did to me in my first two weeks as a student there. People don’t believe it when I say I wasn’t always looking like a skeleton and I didn’t always walk like wind would blow me away. But within my first two weeks in that school, my story changed. Bones that I never knew existed became visible. My eyes sunk inside and have never come out since. My Adam’s apple grew beautifully not because of puberty but hunger. I had a 6-pack from hunger – no excersise needed, I drank tap water so much (because between 16-20 people were expected to share one medium sized jug of water) I developed immunity to typhoid. I discovered how to eat rice and stew without the stew! I can go on but I have to stop before you get bored.

In conclusion, All I can say is I have suffered in a way I never ‘esper-red’. 

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“Go To School.” How hard can it be?

They said we must go to school, that education is the key.
They said to get good jobs and better our lives we must go to school.

But nobody told us we would have to sit on the floors in school, and use building blocks as support for our beds.
Nobody told us Mosquitos would have us for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Nobody told us that using the toilet was a straight road to the hospital.
Nobody told us that JAMB would frustrate all our efforts even after we managed to pass Maths and English.
Nobody told us that our teachers and government multiply our duration in school.
Nobody told us we would have to satisfy our teachers sexual and financial desires to obtain the piece of paper called a certificate.
Nobody said anything about increasing our school fees inconsiderately.

Nobody said anything about how difficult it was to get a job.
Nobody told us that if you didn’t have a masters you were unqualified and if you had a doctorate you were overqualified.

All they told us was “go to school”, we did and now we wonder why, because we never used what we learnt in school.

HELP! My Country Wants to Frustrate My Education!!!

Dear diary,
I’m not even sure where to begin. My name is Mercy and I’m ALMOST
a student of Obafemi Awolowo University Ile-Ife. Why did I say
almost? Well, that’s simple, I haven’t matriculated…
so, YES! my name is still in PENCIL (and small letters).

I graduated from secondary school in july 2012 with a very good result (I must hype myself, if not..who will?) and immediately went in for the so called pre-degree program, which I finished in june 2013 (it lasted for 9months and it wasn’t a bed of roses). I got my admission in september after lots of praying and crying to Abah Father to help OAU’s managements thinking faculty (meaning,because OAU is an unhurried institution)I and all things being equal to resume in January 2014

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But ALL HAIL ASUU! I ended up resuming June 1, 2014! Oh happy Day! I was too relieved and excited to start this 5 year phase of my life!. Little did I know.

So dear, I resumed on the day we were asked too because I
couldn’t bear to stay one extra minute at home after spending a YEAR
at home despite my amazing results (It was actually eleven months but 1year sounds more painful). I even used to joke about my brain being in hibernation due to lack of use. I started all the required registration and suffered like a normal fresher would…ya’ll can imagine right? I started to
understand my roommates , get used to the despicable toilet and
bathroom and even love my room corner which I’d like to describe as a rat
hole!

And then it happened!

After two weeks of resumption, the SU (student union not scripture union) of OAU decided that a school fee increase was
silly, unnecessary ,inconsiderate and an act of theft and they
couldn’t afford it…blah blah blah, what was my own I initially thought but soon it was time to PROTEST!

I don’t particularly know all the details of what went down
between the VC and the SUG but whatever I found myself home after
barely three weeks of resuming for a new session. That’s just depressing. I’m not here to give you details just incase you’re as clueless as a new born here.
AND here again

Well, after all the, the deliberations and meetings between the SUG and the VC and his senate,the school was shut down INDEFINITELY by the VC,based on charges that weren’t even true. I can’t describe how I feel. After TWO WEEKS of resumption!

I don’t know who to blame, I’m sad because nobody really cares, frustrated because time is passing by each and everyday, angry at so many people and situations that I cant even control and I feel cheated!!!!! So YES, I’m back home now,doing house chores, practicing makeup, bead-making and
essentially sleeping away time I should be in school and I am not sure of when I would resume for the 2013/2014 session in OAU when most universities that were also affected by the strike are in their second semester now!!! Not to mention private universities that are a year ahead.

Its sad, so sad,but this is the reality of most Federal university
students in Nigeria now. All in all, I know God has plans for me (BIG
PLANS). I know my future would be brighter than anything I could ever
fathom. I also know that no matter what year I finish I’d get THERE
someday…because the race isn’t too the swiftest.(Its hard to
remember these words when my mates are graduating in two years time
tho! *sighs*)