These are my thoughts

Let me paint you a picture

It’s a Monday morning and you are a man. You and your wife, wake up this Monday morning. You both leave the house together. But you’re a man, so your morning routine is simple. Take your bath get dressed, eat your breakfast  and go. Your wife on the other hand, because she’s a woman and it is “her duty”… she wakes up earlier than you. She is a woman, SHE must see to the children. SHE must prepare the meal. Yet somehow she gets all this done in time, to have you and the children satisfied and still manage to look put together.

You will tell me it’s the way things are supposed to be.

Yes, she is the mother of your children. Biology says she carries the children for 9 months, biology says she breast feeds, biology says she’s generally better at multitasking, biology says her children will have an easier bond with her.

THAT is the way things are supposed to be.

Anything that comes after that, is a man made stipulation. Everything else was determined by society. And in Africa, society is and has been for a long time a collection of MEN.

So back to my scenario.

You both go to work together. You both work hard. She maybe even works harder. But society says…she’s a woman so she earns just enough to keep her motivated but not what she deserves. You and your wife come back home after a long Monday. You get home generally at the same time. Maybe she works in a bank on the island, so she even gets home later.

But you are a man, so you get home and take a nap and wait for her. She will sort out dinner. Or maybe you don’t nap. You decide to watch some news…or maybe even pick up your laptop; continue your work, pursue your career. You’re a man.

Biology did not say, but still somehow she is supposed to do “her duty”. So her work never ends, she is somehow supposed to sustain a career and keep you happy. Because society says. And you’re man.

But my dear, biology said nothing about that.

I did not come here to continue the twitter rant. I just want to point out a trend.

I want you to know that all of this is why Africans will not move forward. We are an entire continent full of a unique race with beautiful and creative minds. Soaking up education like a sponge, holding steadfast to our belief in a sovereign God despite everything we are faced with. Yet we are toxic to ourselves.

A while back, Ugo and I were tackling one random African American guy on twitter when he started talking crap about Africa… but now I think about it and realize that he had some valid points.

Because how can a continent so blessed and so gifted have the intellectuals and religious leaders and political leaders and the common people alike still holding on to poisonous and absurd standards about stipulated roles and ill-conceived differences.

“This is the way things are supposed to be”

Yet the whole world around us has changed. Almost literally, the ground as been taken away from under us.  All that’s left is quick sand and we keep struggling. We’re killing ourselves.


A couple of decades ago, your wife could never work in a bank, or become a doctor or wake on a Monday morning and say “I’m going to work”. So if we could let that change…what system are we using to pick and choose our realities ?  Who decides these things

Everything changes. Everything evolves.

We live in a world where Trump may become President.  A 15 year old girl won a Nobel Prize. People carry their phones around and chase Pokemon but that’s not strange. I post something on the blog and the whole world can see it.

Everything is possible. Let’s not be our own limitations

These are my thoughts.

Kindly get your head out of your ass



2 Replies to “These are my thoughts”

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