Weekend Chilling In Secondary School

In Secondary school, Friday nights were the best nights of the week, right before they turned into the worst. Some guys had special perfumes reserved for Friday nights. Specially ironed trousers (trousers were always specially ironed to be honest, gators needed to be like the sword from Samurai X). We’d clean Palm Slippers reserved exclusively for Friday nights and carry, nap-sacks or whatever bag was in vogue at that point, comb our hairs so straight that they looked totally different from every other day of the week. Then we’d head to Dinning hall to destroy some Friday night Garri and Beans. Some extreme people would even bring their own Garri, but hey, who am I to judge. Garri always had a weird effect on my eyes.

Then the girls would come out. Who needed makeup in secondary school. Hair on fleek, eyebrows, well few girls had the tools and the know how to do eyebrow magic but the perfume, the perfume would choke up the atmosphere. But who cared. We were looking at finer girls.

Night prep on Friday night was rarely about reading. It was about ‘chikeing’, ‘runzing’ or whatever word we used at that point to describe trying to date a girl. You found yourself the finest girl that would talk to you and relocate to her class. Yes this was our own club, our Quilox, where the Garri was some expensive wine you drank before talking to the girl and not why you spoke. It was all about socialising. Till the bell rings.

Because when that bell rang you knew hell was 30 minutes away. Its like your organs just dropped to the floor. It was our own Cinderella story, you go from royalty to poverty at 12 except ours was by 9:30. You knew that When you get to the hostels, you must prepare for inspection.

Inspection brought out all sorts of demons in senior students. Belts would fly and crash against skin and bones, hard enough to make you want to cry but not hard enough to leave permanent scars. Brooms would romance the concrete floors in ceaseless profession of dirty soapy water love. Wipers would make the toilet floors look brand new, so new that no one was allowed to use the toilets till 12pm on Saturday. Should someone stupidly use the toilets, the whole dormitory would feel pain. Most people slept late at night because of the workload and everyone had to wake up by 5am to continue hell.

I remember in my JS 2 or 3 when I was a gutter ranger. We would get in the gutter with only a pair of slippers for protection,, sweep, flush, wipe, repeat for hours till the gutter looked as clean as the overslept pavement. Skin irritation would not even come to your kind because we had the black man blood. People would pick up rakes and rake up the sand, creating beautiful horizontal and vertical lines that I took pleasure stepping on after the inspection. Then we would sprinkle freshly cut flowers all over everything. Make no mistake, inspections were pomp and pageantry. Fast runners would go around spraying air freshness few seconds before the inspectors arrived.

Without bathing, everyone jumped into house wear uniforms, combed hair, cut (or chewed off) nails, and looked like they were going to visit the principal. It always bothered me how everything was clean during inspection except the human bodies that had been in gutters and what not but you dare not use the bathroom!

Everyone wanted to win inspection because if you didn’t, it meant more torment the next Friday/Saturday. People would just come up with ridiculous things that should be meticulously cleaned, like the light switch, or wires connecting the fan.

I cannot omit Friday night sickness that kept plaguing the same people every Friday night. I don’t know how they did it, but people would genuinely have insanely high temperatures every Friday night and be perfectly normal Saturday afternoon. It was annoying because someone else had to cover their workload and a lot of times I had to do that.

The rest of the weekend was generally for relaxing and getting over the trauma of inspection, as well as church. 

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45 thoughts on “Weekend Chilling In Secondary School”

  1. Omg!! I can never forget those days, before prep every girl who had loosened her hair came out with her hair styled to perfection; or so we thought😆😁 For people like me the torture for inspection continued till my last year as I was the house captain, it was a source of happiness when your house was announced first on Monday morning and you were to come out to get the overused plaque 😄😂😂 The good old days! Thanks for bringing back these memories

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  2. Omg!! This is so true, before prep girls that had loosened their hair that Friday night styled it to perfection and the shortest house wears were worn. For me the torture for inspection continued till my last year as I was a house captain😑😕, it was a source of happiness when your house was announced as the neatest and you were called upon to receive the overused plaque on Monday morning during announcement😂😂😂. Thanks for bringing back these memories 😂😂😄😆

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  3. Was a toilet ranger for 3 years. Jss3 till ss2. Till Saturday morning when I picked flowers. … wow. Those good old days. Still don’t know what’s up with red house till today? why they always won that overused plaque…. well said……

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  4. Omo, I picked flowers from Admin block and raked the soil in front of Blue House Girls Hostel. It was fun going to fetch Flowers.

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  5. Awww. This expresses our experiences in a uniquely beautiful way. Now we have our own story to tell. Never knew such experiences could be written in a brilliant novel-style😊😊😙😙😃😃

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  6. Awww. This expresses our experiences in a uniquely beautiful way. Now we have our own story to tell. Never knew such experiences could be written in a brilliant novel-style😊😊😙😙😃😃

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  7. Was funny tho. It took me time to realize it’s fedacad. Is that my D. Hall? TBH, inspection time was my best time as AS DH. No need for inspection, quality teacher version of food and stuff. Best time ever. But not cool during J.years. Damn, Greyel guys suffered during those periods.

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  8. Lmaoooo….say na Quilox…lool to the booze of garri. Very well written Ugo!! Unfortunately not everyone experienced these inspections

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  9. I was a bloody nonner
    But the fear of inspection and the Saturday morning work becomes part of you after a while
    It was a well written article
    Was a corridor worker

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  10. This is so true. I don’t even know what to say. Mine also continued till ss3 as I was house captain. You start thinking once its 9pm on Friday night after making fine hair. This describes our experiences very well. Well done Ugo

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  11. This is soon true…but being in an only girls school was worse I think.on Friday nights all the seniors morph into witches for Saturday morning inspection. God bless your soul if your house doesn’t win

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