Alex’s Lamentation: Dating A Numbskull

My name is Alex. It’s short for Alex. I am just a regular guy with a lot of dreams struggling day to day to accomplish those dreams so that by the time I am ready to die I can be sure I have contributed my fair share to humanity. 

My mother once told me in confidence that she was not sure whether my father had or did not have another child outside their marriage. She said she had come across another marriage certificate with my father and another woman’s name on it so she had good reason for her suspicion. However she remained faithful to him. 

My father on the other hand had never given anyone any suspicion to doubt his loyalty to my mother. That was untill a few years ago when he became unnervingly close to another woman. Eventually my father went away and never came back. Leaving that woman with a child and my mother with me and my siblings. Although his actions shocked his family members, it was not a scenario that they hadn’t imagined. 

Coming back to my life, in have a friend who at one point I saw like a sister. We were never that close but the respect I had for her so so much that I would stick my neck out to defend her. I still would do that now but with more reservation. Her name is Martha. Today Martha and I are not as close as we were at the climax of her friendship but we are still friends. I met Martha’s fiancé – Ayo, before they even started dating. He was never one of those guys I would have envisaged Martha with. They were two different people. Ayo was a friend to a course mate turned colleague. He was one of those extra-ordinary guys. Always getting into minor troubles and squabbles. 

Anyway that’s in the past. Today Ayo and Martha are engaged but I fear for Martha but I don’t know whether I have the right nor audacity to tell her. I overheard Ayo and my colleague discussing or rather celebrating how he had finally participated in a conference he for so long had wanted to participate in- a gang banging. I was perplexed and bewildered. How would an engaged man be participating in such?  I wish that were all I had seen and overheard. I remember     on two separate occasions I met Ayo and my colleague so stoned that they could barely stand. On a separate occasion I heard another colleague talk about how Ayo had almost been arrested for DUI save for his capacious pockets. 

I wish it was that I cared about her on emotional terms so there would be justification for my fears but I am engaged to the most beautiful woman in the world and I don’t intend to loose her for anyone else. I am between a rock and a hard place as to whether I tell Martha or not. But in the mean time I pray. I do not want to be found judgemental so I have additional reservations. 

I fear Martha may end up like my mother if she marries Ayo, married to a douche bag. I may not forgive myself if this happens. I am between a rock and a hard place.  

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